Cromer Times: Dead Man's Fingers

PC McGarry Number 452....

2008-03-19T18:31:00.005Z

Or rather PC303 Gary Medler.

Remember when we still had Policemen?

Not the Spidey-Belt toting Wanna-be ninjas of a Fascist-Militia we have now but COPPERS and BOBBYS?

Coppers who didn't feel they needed stab-vests to be able to talk to us on the street?
Bobbys who would walk up to a group of youths alone, without an Armed Response Team, and those youths would call them 'Sir' cos, even if they thought the copper was a total twat, they knew he knew all their parents?

Well PC Medler is just such an old-school Peeler, a Bobby who knows that a quiet word at the right time is far more effective than an ASBO.

Reading through the minutes of the Town Council today I saw that PC Medler actually defended the youth of the town at one of their Council meetings last year and explained to their Worships that not all the kids here are hoody wearing granny raping 'paths !

Nice one Gary! Long may the sound of your size 12's be heard on the streets here. Firm, friendly and fair,You listen, you talk TO the kids of this town and not AT them, you don't assume that everyone under 65 is guilty by default and that's why the kids here treat you with some respect still...unlike some of your colleagues.

Update On Mill Rd Bus-Stop Shelter..or the lack of.

2008-03-19T15:08:00.008Z

Just spent a mind numbingly boring hour going through the last few months minutes of the Town Council.

It seems a complaint (singular?) was received that the bus shelter was being used as a toilet and so
the council decided to tear it down. Of course if they hadn't closed the Public Lavs there years ago then maybe ....

Originally the idea was to replace it with a plastic shelter but now that's been relegated to 'if felt needed'.

So one 'Indignant From Suffield Park' letter was enough to get it torn down. One wonders how many letters asking for a plastic bus shelter will have to be received before they put one up?

If the Amigos of the Town Council are so bothered by al-fresco excretion then they might like to do something about all the fucking dog shit here...or rather put pressure on the District Council to deal with it.

oooOOh OOOH Zoophilia at the Norfolk Show

2008-03-19T10:11:00.005Z

Helter-Shelter

2008-03-18T13:06:00.005Z

Why are they tearing down the brick bus shelter on Mill Rd , opposite the Hospital????!
It didn't seem in bad repair and actually afforded the traveler some shelter.
Or is it because it was one of the few places left where the kids of Suffield Park could meet, sit and chat?
We will see what replaces it? My guess is nothing, there'll just be a bus stop sign.
Back in the day we even had a public toilet there which was great for the Oldies (most of Suffield Park!) and the otherwise incontinent.

Blues 'n Tunes and Double Reds

2008-03-17T12:55:00.011Z

Church Street might have an ecclesiastical name but there's little holy about it. Especially not for the 999 services.

Either there are delivery lorries half on the pavement or some elderly twat in driving gloves has decided to pull in to let the 'memsahib' out.

Well there is a quick and cheap solution.

Double Red Lines.

We don't see them here but they are used a lot up in London.
Double Red Lines mean simply 'NO PARKING OR STOPPING FOR ANY FUCKING REASON WHATSOEVER!! NO EXCEPTIONS FOR NOBODY" No exceptions for disabled drivers nor for taxis.

The parking bay infront of Boots could be re-signed as a loading bay for deliveries only.

SuuuuUUUUURFFFSSSss Up!

2008-03-16T10:16:00.002Z

You gotta be fucking retarded to want to surf.
You have to have a fucking death wish to want to submerge yourself in the irradiated cesspool called the North Sea. My hair looks just fine without lumps of shit and used Tampax , thank you.

If I should ever feel the need to wear full body latex and bath in other people's sewage then there are private clubs that cater for such desires.

But lotta people DO enjoy it and more and more Surfers are coming to Cromer.
And this is a GOOD THING.
We need all the surfers we can get.

Why?

Surfers bring LIFE STYLE.

Surfers bring MONEY

Surfers are the Foodies Vanguard, the cultural stormtroopers of the Jamie Oliver generation . Look at what happened to Cornwall.

Beach parties, music and young aspiring chefs.
Galengal and lemon grass follow surfers as surely as used condoms and empty 'tinnies'!
The days of the beach being a demented regatta of windbreaks and thermos-fondling fat Geordies with knotted handkerchiefs on their heads is over. There is no money there anymore.

Wake Up And Smell The Charcoal....and the subtle aroma of bbq'd salmon in a light thai fusion dressing.

THE-POWERS-THAT-BE need to actively encourage surfers to come here.

And the bestes way to do that would be to find them somewhere to park!

Open up the promenade from the Gangway to the Melbourne Slope for cars and VW buses with
boards attached. £10 a day and they get a voucher for a free bottle of Budwipe. Make more money than the embarrassing yellow 'Road Train'.
Allow surfers to hold BBQ's and late night parties on the beach.
Organise some events.

*edit I found these comments after posting. Seems I've got it about right.
http://www.beachwizard.com/beach.asp?country=England&beachid=990

"It Lives Master, it LIVES!" or Why this Blog?

2008-03-15T12:17:00.000Z

Why this blog? Well, its cheaper than therapy and slightly less addictive than medication. Its so I can get those things about Cromer ("Gem Of The Norfolk Coast") that annoy me off my chest. I hope people will stumble upon it before they decide to visit the town.

You can expect biting comment, searing adult language and low resolution cellphone pictures
as I side step the piles of dog shit and nimbly dodge the mobility scooters (two topics I shall return to often) that are as much a characteristic of the town as crabs, inbreeding and the mistaken belief that the North Norfolk News (hereafter "Rabbit Breeder Weekly") is a newspaper.

testing 123 testing

2008-03-15T09:32:00.000Z

Setting up CNAME blah blah blah